windowless study LIX

Mr Trap was the one to hear it whilst walking his dog. ‘Get an axe!’ he shouted. ‘There’s somebody inside the oak tree.’

‘I don’t know what happened,’ the man shouted from inside. ‘Where are my shoes?’

‘Where are my shoes? What kind of a question is that?’ asked Mr Brink. ‘He sounds crazy to me.’

‘Maybe we should leave him in there.’

‘You can’t leave him in there,’ said Mr Trap.

‘Why not? Any man who allows himself to be trapped inside a tree who then begins to rant about shoes is crazy in my book.’

They voted on whether to leave him inside or not but the result was a tie.

‘It’s a dead heat,’ said Mr Trap. ‘Why don’t we ask him a question in order to ascertain if he’s crazy or not?’

‘Like what?’

‘Like ‘Who is the President of my shed?’’

‘What kind of a question is that? You’re as crazy as he is.’

‘Just ask him?’

‘Hey! You inside the tree! Who’s the president of Mr Trap’s shed?’

‘Shoelaces,’ replied the man in a very hollow, wooden voice.

‘What was that? Did he say ‘shoelaces’?’

‘Shoelaces,’ repeated the man.

They all decided to leave him to his fate and went instead to stare at Mr Aw’s empty pond for a while.